Rough Week

So I have tried to post several times this week, but deleted everything. It has been kind of a rough few days. Not because Mom's condition has changed, she is still doing amazingly well. She is scheduled to begin chemotherapy on Monday. She also has an appointment at the radiologist on Monday morning. We are ready for the next step in this battle but a little nervous at the same time. How hard will this be on Mom physically? How will this change her? Not only have I heard of chemo brain but they are going to radiate her brain. Anyway those questions and more are creating some anxiety.

I think I have just been feeling overwhelmed and inadequate. Trying to be what everyone needs and feeling like I am not enough to anyone. A good daughter taking care of my mother, spending time with my mother, taking care of my father as he gives his all and everything to take care of my mother, taking care of my mother-in-law as she deals with some entirely different issues. (By the way, her mother died of brain cancer 50 years ago.) A good wife in the midst of all of those things. A good sister, a good friend, a good teacher. Thank God for the small children I teach. I don't know what I would have done this week if I did not have them to make me smile and take my mind off of everything else! I told Brian one morning this week as I was crying on my way to work that I needed to just put all of these things away for a few hours and go teach small children. They do make me smile!

Maybe I just need to follow the doctor's orders and take some Me Time. Then I might feel better! Anyway I think it is time to go back to bed now. That will have to be my Me Time for now.